Ahoy-hoy, Darlingites! This edition of John’s Editorials is brought to you by the irreversible Michael Darling, and the letter “O.” As in, “OMG, I can’t believe I’ve been hosting ‘Dear Darling’ for 100 episodes!” I know John usually writes these, but in honor of this milestone, he let me tag in! And here I am, ready to talk about one of my favorite subjects: ME!
That’s right, it’s been 100 episodes since I took over “Dear Darling” from my sister, Wendy, and our numbers are better than ever! (Not that it’s a competition.) Wendy was the inventor of the format, after all. And mostly, I’m just glad she and I are on speaking terms again.
Since Mr. Hook has ALL the money, I expect my salary will go up a million percent. But don’t worry, I have no plans to retire. I love all of you too much! And, look, as long as we’re talking about it, I’m gonna get sappy for a second. I couldn’t do this show without all of you viewers. I literally couldn’t. Without you, I’d have nobody to give advice to! So I wanted to take a minute to do a bunch of shoutouts to friends of the show, people who help make “Dear Darling” the Kensington Chronicle’s most popular advice vlog. In no particular order:
JH Media computer whiz Zoe Penderghast, who helped salvage my hard drive after it got wet during the last Fish Girl Pond concert. Hannah Hope, one of my high school buds, who just recently became a teacher at Neverland High. Say hi to Aurelia Lavoix for me, she’s the voice coach there! Gotta give the Heisel twins credit for world’s best prank, even if it was at my expense! You know what you did. Officer Kenzi Martin, who’s been helping Sheriff Lestrade settle into his new position.
My favorite non-human guest, Chuckles the high-fiving cat, and her human, Shirley Positive. I’ve never met Alexander Trell in person, I don’t think anyone has seen him since he was 12. But he writes in on a regular basis, and John tells me his books on LGBT issues are absolute page turners. Maddy Pfairlove and her amazing strawberry banana smoothies. Cornish Curios curator Brigid Cornish, who keeps coming up in conversation. Holy alliteration, Batman!
Melissa “Buttons” Wilson for hosting our staff Bad Movie Nights. Neverwhere Inn, where Colleen Husted leaves the light on for all of our celebrity guests. Rufio Bascom of Rufio Consignments, who provided my jacket for the anniversary episode. Vehura Hoshino and Luath Events for organizing the Chronicle Christmas party this past year. Kaz and Bronwen for being the best interns a guy could have.
And I can’t leave out Jo and Freddie Wentworth, who created “Dear Darling’s” littlest fan, baby Lillian. And of course, Monstro, Columbine Hailtree, Lily Belle Abbott, Erin Wilbert, Valeria Smooth, Kensy, Adelaide Turner, Big Matthew C., Amanda Carter and Ann Jensen, but you kids are getting a special shoutout in the anniversary show, so I’ll just name drop you all here. Oh, but I will say to Monstro… glad to hear you and Teresa Delacruz worked out your differences, buddy.
We’ve got a star-studded anniversary episode in store for you guys this week. It’s all I can do not to post the lineup here, but that’d spoil the surprise! Moving forward, you might see videos even more often! I have my entire room to myself for a change, which means I can do videos at all hours.
Thank you guys so much for making “Dear Darling” possible. You ain’t seen nothing yet!
Sent from my iPhone,