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Neverspeak Weekly 3/14/17

Some Enchanted Vending… If you haven’t been to Neverland Books recently, it may be worth a visit. Owner Bri Valdivia recently installed a book dispenser that seems to be a bit magical. Word on the street is that it works like a regular vending machine (which by the way, I love the idea of a vending machine for books!), but the books it gives customers are oddly specific. Customer Gemma Willoe received a book about being happily single, while a certain gossip columnist who shall remain nameless got Harriet the Spy. No one knows exactly how this is happening, but there is some belief that fairy magic might be behind it. Given the recent influx of fairies into Neverland, that seems like a pretty good guess! After you’ve finished your spring cleaning, you might as well fill up your book shelf with titles that are tailored to you!

Spring Forward. You all may have cursed the daylight savings gods when you lost an hour of sleep on Sunday, but you know what that extra hour of sun means! It’s time for the annual Spring Fling. This coming Tuesday at 8PM rather than waiting for my column with baited breath, Neverlandians will be donning their finest frocks and dancing the night away. The ball will be the culmination of the Spring Festival in which Neverlandians celebrate the Vernal Equinox with two days of events including the Firefly Festival at the Skeleton Tree and High Tea Mixer held in the Garden of Light. The times of all events can be found on the community calendar. Looking forward to seeing the ensembles as colorful as all these spring flowers!

Bachelor No More. One of Neverland’s favorite couples is making it official! Bri Valdivia and Sheriff Harrison “Tacos” Lestrade are getting married. The couple was engaged during Thanksgiving last year and their April 29th wedding is quickly approaching. But, before the wedding can take place there, of course, has to be a bachelor party. I believe it is my responsibility to make this public service announcement. Stay off the streets on the night of April 14 because the men of Neverland will be having a wild night on the town. But, be warned, boys, the women of Neverland will not be shown up. Bri’s wedding shower will be held this Thursday at 6PM!

Local Initiatives. According to some folks, this column was a little hard on Lola Williams last week. To make up for it, I’d like to plug her new business, Sunny & Lola’s. Lola and her horse Sunday (Sunny for short) are in the business of teaching horseback riding (not boyfriend stealing!).  Teresa Delacruz, known mostly for her talent with the supernatural, has turned her attention to a more literary project. Follow her hashtag #NeverlandReads to hear her thoughts as she reads Jane Austen’s Emma for the first time. Or join her and use the hashtag yourself! I, for one, have read Emma at least a dozen times. I’m not sure why I relate to the character of a meddlesome busybody who gets into everyone’s business so much, but I do!

Too Many Secrets! Buddha once said, three things cannot long stay hidden: the sun, the moon and the truth. We must not have many buddhists in Neverland because it seems like everyone has a secret these days! And for a GOSSIP COLUMNIST this is very frustrating. So, now I’m going to frustrate you readers, and the chain of deception will continue to be forged link by link. Wendy Darling may be gathering forces for a secret project (apparently involving pizza), Amy Jolie may be revealing a well-kept secret at the upcoming Spring Fling, and Nanny Ams may have had a secret rendezvous with a charming chimney sweep in the Garden of Light last week.  Who knows?

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Posted in Neverspeak
Posted on March 14, 2017

Your Pot of Gold

Hey Wendy!

How do you deal with time management and motivation? I always plan my days out based on what I have to get done, but I never accomplish anything because I get distracted or bored! Thanks!

Sincerely,

Halli P.

Dear Halli,

This is an interesting question. When someone has to get something done, I would usually tell them to make a plan, mapping out how to get from point A to point B step by step. But, you, my dear, have the plan but are having a hard time sticking to it.

You say you either get bored or distracted. I wonder, Halli, do you feel connected to what you are doing? Sometimes we have to have the why before the how. Even though my work load seems overwhelming at times, I always endeavor to plow through it because it is the work that I love. Helping people in creative ways is my calling and I get to do it every day through writing this column, making a vlog, and working on my next book.

Now I realize that not everyone gets to spend their days doing exactly what they love. But, I also believe that we all deserve to be working towards that. So what is your pot of gold at the end of the rainbow? What dream are you chasing? Do you want to be your own boss, do you want to travel the world, do you want to buy a house and make it your own?

I want you to really spend some time thinking about this and when you have an answer (or a few!), I want you to post reminders of that goal all around your work space. If you are more of a left-brained person, that may just be notes that say “Trip to Spain!” or “Opening my own yoga studio.” If you are more right brained, you might want to make a vision board or pick out an inspiring song to listen to any time you need a boost. The point is, if you keep reminding yourself of the ‘why’, the how will be easier to navigate.

Once you have your dream or, in other words, your motivation in mind, try some of these tricks for how to stay focused and avoid distractions. You say that you plan out your days already. That’s great! Now take that list of tasks and prioritize them. You can do this by urgency, but I suggest doing it by complexity of the task. The reason for this is that our first hour of working is when our brain is firing at all cylinders.  The longer we’re at it, the more tired our noggin gets.  So, use that magic time to get the most creative task accomplished.

Here’s an example. Let’s say this afternoon I have to shoot out some emails, clean my desk, and write an article. Well, often I am tempted to start with the mindless task first (most likely cleaning my desk) and build up to that hard one! But, unless one of the emails is URGENT, I should really start with the article while my brain is the least tired.

Recognize that even when you get your goals in order and you have your motivation, there will be times (probably a lot more than you’d like) when you just won’t feel like working. This is called resistance and it’s natural and annoying. You just have to recognize it for what it is and push through it. The difference between a professional athlete and an amateur is the former’s ability to work and practice even when they don’t feel like it.  Setting timers for yourself and putting your phone on airplane mode can help keep you on track.

Most people overestimate what they can do in a day and underestimate what they can do in a year. Recognize that you are only human and only have so much energy, focus, and stamina. Be realistic about what you can feasibly accomplish in a day and spread your bigger projects out over weeks or months. If you whittle your todo list down to 3 items for the day rather then the never-ending list that just rolls over and over, you’ll have a much better chance at feeling a sense of peace and accomplishment rather than stress at the end of the day. Then you can rest, rejuvenate and be ready for your 3 items tomorrow.

All in all, be kind to yourself, Halli. Remember that you are more than your todo list, more than the sum of your achievements. You are a very human person who is probably delightful in lots of human ways just trying to figure it all out. The more you can be your own cheerleader rather than your own bully, the closer you’ll get to becoming the woman you want to be.

Always yours,

Wendy

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Posted in Ask Wendy
Posted on March 9, 2017

A Lively Night

Hey Wendybirds!

I am so excited to bring Ask Wendy back to the new K-Chron!  Sooooo excited that I spent an hour last night giving advice live from my office at the new JH Media building visible from…well, everywhere in Neverland.  The last year has been a whirlwind and it was so magical to return to the place where it all began.  Me, you and a web cam in good, old Neverland, Ohio.

Always yours,

Wendy

PS) Hope you enjoy the input from my trusty assistant as much as I did.  Remember, darlings, no matter how hard life gets, a good friend can always make it better.  (And a good laugh, too!)

 

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Posted in Ask Wendy
Posted on March 2, 2017

Neverspeak Weekly 2/28/17

OK-Chron! Everyone in Neverland is so excited to see the new changes in the Kensington Chronicle. A pleased Sheriff Tacos was overheard saying, “I still can’t believe what they’ve done to our paper!” Well, believe it. Neverland’s favorite son, Jas Hook has taken your beloved paper and brought it into the 21st century! Soon all the world will be reading about the very important topics we cover here at the paper. Why would anyone want to create a petition called Disinfect the Chronicle to return the paper to how it used to be? Why would anyone want to do that? Beats me.

Good Bye? On February 16, Neverlandians gathered to bid farewell to one of the town’s most beloved figures. George Darling has retired – completely voluntarily – from his post as Editor in Chief at what used to the Kensington Chronicle. He happily “passed the baton” in his words to the “magnanimous” Jas Hook who attended the party along with all the other Darlings. Though some people were crying into their root beer floats, Mr. Darling was all smiles as he proclaimed, “It just so happens that today I’m starting my all cake diet.”

Ask Her. Neverland’s favorite advice vlogger, writer, and redhead will be taking your questions tonight at 10PM Eastern time. As you know, Wendy Darling has remained on the recently edited staff here at the K-Chron. You can ask her anything, anything at all. Having followed Ms. Darling’s career for years, I know she is great at coming up with answers for everything from existential crises to romantic entanglements to really awkward questions about why one’s boyfriend might take over one’s family’s company only to completely change everything about it and stomp on the first amendment.

Newerlandians. Walking around town I’ve been glimpsing some new faces here in Neverland. We’ve got a psychic in town – which is great because I’m sure we’d all like to know how long we’re going to have to put up with this crazy guy who is messing with everything we hold dear. I’m talking about President Trump, of course. Please tell us it won’t be another 4 years, Heavenly Imagine! Also Jane Mannering is manning the cashier at Skull Rock Sweets, Codamae Elizabeth is sipping tea at Straight On Till Morning, Enya Rose is hosting Dance Fitness Parties, and Sarah Lightly is annoying Tinker Bell wherever she goes.

A Family Affair.  While crabbing in the Bering Sea for the last few weeks, I discovered a latent passion for marine biology. I’ve returned to Neverland not only to work at this glorious new version of our old paper, but also to apply to grad schools. This requires lots of studying musty old books rather than studying you.  I’ve always considered Neverland to be a great big family.  A great big family full of people who love each other, watch out for each other, and know all each other’s secrets. If you guys could help me assemble this column by sharing juicy tidbits and heartwarming stories you’d like to see posted, please DM me or use the Got Hot Gossip? form on the Neverspeak Weekly Page. With your help, I can keep this column cooking along with the crabs. So. Many. Crabs.

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Posted in Neverspeak
Posted on March 1, 2017

Caveat Emptor

Neverlandians, by now you have no doubt heard that my father, George Darling, is stepping down from his position as editor-in-chief of the Kensington Chronicle. When Father made a deal with Mr. Hook to sell the paper to JH Media, we were assured that he would continue to run the day-to-day operations at the Chronicle, and that the paper would not be substantially changed going forward. But, from what little he’s told me about it, to all appearances my father’s resignation is a matter of creative differences between himself and the new management. That being the case, I can’t help the nagging suspicion that the winds are about to change here at our local paper, and quite possibly not for the better.

Though my father’s separation from his beloved local newspaper appears on the surface to be entirely amicable, the fact of the matter is George Darling is a man of far too much integrity to air his dirty laundry in a public forum. If there is something more contentious underlying his departure, we may likely never know about it. And the whole situation is further complicated by the fact that our new editor-in-chief, Jas Hook himself, is inextricably entangled with the Darling family on a personal level; it’s no secret that he and my sister Wendy have been happily dating since her time working at JH Media’s corporate headquarters in New York City.

Now, don’t get me wrong: I have used this very space to sing Mr. Hook’s praises in the past. My respect for him as a self-made media mogul knows no bounds. And he has given me no reason to believe that he has anything but the best of intentions when it comes to my sister; Mr. Hook and Wendy are, I think, a coupling to which we all could aspire. But I can believe all of those things about him and still have reservations about some of the decisions he’s made re: the Chronicle, even in the short time he’s been at the helm, not the least of which being his decision to take the paper global. For a paper that has been about hyperlocal news since its inception, that sends up a big red flag.

And it is with great regret that I report that this article you are now reading will be the last of the John Darling editorials, such as they have been. And perhaps I don’t have quite as much integrity as my father, because I feel compelled to say that the cessation of this feature is in no way a choice that I have made; it is, rather, an edict that has come down from up on high. It is my sincerest hope that the demise of my longtime column is in no way connected with my vocal equivocation about the direction of the Chronicle under the new management (though, to Mr. Hook’s credit, he has allowed me to run this piece unedited, in its original form). I had hoped to one day be the top newsman myself here at the Chronicle, but I have in effect been demoted from assistant to the editor-in-chief to merely a staff writer. As of this moment, I do not know the type of content I will be expected to produce under the new regime. I would love it if my instincts about all of this were wrong; but they so very rarely are.

Dear readers, I cannot thank you enough for your unwavering support over lo these many years. And I am not going anywhere! Not yet. The Kensington Chronicle as we knew it may be dead, replaced instead by the K-Chron, but some things never change. As long as I’m here, you, the people of Neverland, will have a voice. And don’t hesitate to tell me on Twitter what you think of this new direction in the days and weeks to come. The Kensington Chronicle has always been a paper of and for the people; and if I have anything to say about it, the same will hold true for the K-Chron.

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Posted in Editorials
Posted on February 20, 2017

The More They Stay The Same

People of Neverland, Jas Hook here.  My darling Wendy recently brought it to my attention that her family’s local newspaper has been floundering.  This news kicked me back on my heels, and spurred me on to do something about it; not just because the Kensington Chronicle matters to Wendy but because it matters to me.  I, too, read John’s editorials week in and week out, and take no small source of pleasure from Michael’s Dear Darling videos.  What’s more, even though I’ve spent the better part of my life far from the town I first called home, an important part of my heart has always been in Neverland.  For a long time, I was the only out-of-state subscriber to the Chronicle.  Shipping a copy to New York on a daily basis is not the cheapest proposition in the world, but being the CEO of a massive global conglomerate like JH Media does occasionally have its privileges.  Honestly, my advisors recommended against acquiring the Chronicle; “It doesn’t make any sense,” they told me, “Not from a financial standpoint.” Well, I’ll tell all of you exactly what I told them: JH Media is about more than just what makes “financial sense.”

I didn’t really know Mr. George Darling very well in high school, but I’ve spent a great deal of time with him on my most recent visit to Neverland.  And I’m happy to report that he’s every bit the charming, local hero that the paper makes him out to be.  His passion for the Chronicle is unmatched (except, perhaps, by that of his son John), and I’m proud to say that more than a little of that passion has rubbed off on me.  Like George said in his last editorial, the Kensington Chronicle is a Neverland institution.  And as such, I want to inform everyone that JH Media maintains a commitment to making as few changes as possible.  With that in mind, for as long as he’s willing and able, there will always be a place for Mr. George Darling at the helm.

I know that John Darling, editor of our online edition, is a prototypical Neverlandian in his reluctance to embrace change.  It’s my understanding that he’s not been taking the paper’s sale  particularly well, which is why he hasn’t written any editorials for the past several weeks.  But I want to make it clear that I know John’s aversion to the new status quo has nothing to do with me or my company; John and I have enjoyed nothing but the most cordial of relationships since I came into his sister Wendy’s life.  I think John is just having trouble wrapping his mind around the fact that the family business is no longer all in the family.  But I have no doubt that John will come around, and his position will be waiting for him when he does.  Because, as a longtime reader, I understand that the Kensington Chronicle needs John Darling as much as he needs it.

So take heart, people of Neverland: your beloved local newspaper isn’t going anywhere.  If anything, I’m committed to making the Kensington Chronicle better than ever.  I’d also like to invite your input during this period of transition, to make sure we’re putting out a paper that meets, and hopefully even exceeds, your needs.  Despite my complicated history with Neverland, in my heart it’s always been my home.  It is an incredible honor to shepherd my favorite local paper into what I know will be a new era of prosperity, and I’m fully aware of the great responsibility that that entails.  Your stories are the heart of Neverland, constant readers, and we’re going to keep telling your stories.  Because I wouldn’t have it any other way.

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Posted in Editorials
Posted on September 9, 2015

Neverspeak Lastly?

As you all know, there have been a few changes here at the Chronicle in the last couple weeks. The good news is our new owner Jas Hook has assured us that we all still have jobs. The other news is that we aren’t totally sure what those jobs will look like. As JH Media takes over operations, Neverspeak Weekly will be taking a brief hiatus to “retool, reimagine, and reignite.” Though I am a great fan of alliteration, those are Mr. Hook’s words, not mine.

I cannot tell you how much I have enjoyed writing about the goings-on in Neverland this summer. What started out as a job became a true pleasure as I started to think of you less as subjects and more as friends. Since I don’t know when this column will be back up and running, I would like to use this last edition as a moment to reflect on an amazing summer in Neverland. Below I have pulled some of my favorite gossip items from the last 11 issues.

Scandalous!?  Neverlandians’ reactions were mixed to the first publication of this column.  There was a lot of support but also some uncertainty.  Just know that we here at the Kensington Chronicle are trying to shake things up and add a new dimension to our beloved Neverland.  No one knows what that crazy, free-spirit of a gossip columnist Ms. Skylights will be up to next!

A Lovely Night. Neverlandians gathered on Thursday night for the 2nd Annual Midsummer Ball. The night was a smashing success. Though some townsfolk worried that this sophomore outing wouldn’t measure up to last year’s festivities, they were soon mollified and amazed by this year’s ball-to-the-wall bash. With the help of Lily Bagha’s generosity and the Party Planning Committee’s dedication, Neverlandians enjoyed more music and more spectacle than ever before.  Check out the photospread below for the ball’s fierce fashion!

Love Bugs. No bugs had to be planted by this gossip columnist to pick out the couples in the room on Thursday night. Everyone wants their Cinderella moment at a ball, and, happily, a large amount of Neverlandians got just that! Juliet and Wesley were seen sharing bites of ice cream, a charming cowboy made a last minute appearance to dance with a book shop belle, and Bri was seen dancing with Agent Tacos back early from his assignment. And in the most romantic moment of the night, Sarah-Jane Lakewood received a proposal from her boyfriend Alfie.

Taco Time! Bri Vivladia, Agent Tacos and friends had a Taco Night this past Friday on Big Bear Rock. Sources say it was mostly couples sipping on sangria and taking in the beautiful summer night. Eli Traynor escorted Mia Rivers, Juliet Carpenter brought Wesley Parsons, Nanny Ams came with Bertie Screener (before he was scared away by some overly friendly Fate Stalkers.)

Holy Mole-y! The Fate Stalkers have been out in full form braving the summer heat for love. (Though maybe it isn’t so brave since they carry their shade around with them.) Most Neverlandians were happy to see them out and about, but some thought they were getting a little bushy – I mean, pushy. Word has it things got heated between the Stalkers and Bertie Screever after he threw a banana peel into a shrub-covered Stalker. However, things have a way of working out. Through this altercation, the Fate Stalkers met their newest member, the recently inducted Dole the Mole. As far as we know, this is the first animal Fate Stalker.

New Sheriff in Town. G. Harrison Lestrade has been offered the job of Neverland’s Deputy Sheriff pending a background check. But, since he comes directly from the FBI, that shouldn’t be a problem! While we’ve had to say goodbye to a couple of Neverlandians, we are excited to welcome him and accountant Wesley Parsons (who’s looking for a roommate!) to the community full time.

Hearty Party. Everyone had a great time at the Jolly Roger Soda Ship 100 year Anniversary Party. Aimee and Katie served up an endless supply of delicious sweets and treats. Throughout the day patrons answered trivia about the shop’s history in between socializing and listening to a set by Fish Girl Pond. Neverlandians in attendance included Wesley Parsons, Juliet Carpenter, G. Harrison Lestrade, Bri Valdivia, Mia Rivers, Nanny Ams, Teresa Delacruz, and many more.

Neverspear In Love. This is why we love being Neverlandians! Everyone in town turned out to support Peter Pan in his artistic pursuit this past Thursday. Auditions took place on Wednesday, and with only a day’s notice actors took the stage the next night. John Darling, Michael Darling, G. Harrison Lestrade, Teresa Delacruz and Rowan O’Connor joined the cast along with Mr. Pan while Elsa Fairy, Lorelie Williams, Fish Girl Pond and yours truly helped bring the production together. Everyone celebrated a job well done with a toast at the Jolly Roger after the show.

Sign Language. Wendy Darling started her book tour here in Neverland last week. Locals lined up outside of Neverland Books to get their hands on some of the first copies of her new book “Ask Wendy!”. The local, soon to be national, celebrity was gracious and charming as she signed books for everyone who showed up and a few extras for those who couldn’t be there.

Beyond the Pale.  Even though it’s the end of summer and most of us are sun-kissed or just downright red, there have been a few new residents of the paler variety. Maybe they’re Scandinavian? But I never knew Scandinavians to have such a thirst for tomato juice. Well, thankfully, Teresa Delacruz seems to know how to keep those Scandinavians in line.  And don’t worry, she’s back from her vacation to Chicago with Neal.  Even Scandinavian wranglers need a little fun in the sun.

My Fair Soiree. As expected, Ms. Lakewood’s engagement party was quite the event! The guest list included Cecco, Ed Teynte, her roller derby crew, Marvel executives, Chris Pratt and Mermaid Lagoon. Neverlandians in attendance were Wendy Darling, Jas Hook, Sheriff Lestrade, Bri Valdivia, Nanny Ams, and Fish Girl Pond. The surprise of the night was when Special Guest Julie Andrews came out of retirement to sing to the couple.

PS (Perfectly Single). Not knowing that this might be the last Neverspeak for a while, I promised a Singles’ edition. I felt it was more important that I devote this article to a retrospective on the column. But, I do have a few words for the singles out there. Embrace your status because you are in the best position to prepare yourself for a great relationship. As one of my heroes, Lucille Ball, once said, “Love yourself first, and everything else falls into line.”

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Posted in Neverspeak
Posted on September 8, 2015

Neverspeak Weekly 9/1/15

Party Patrol. There was a lot of build-up to Sarah-Jane Lakewood’s NYC engagement party this week. After she enlisted security help from Teresa Delacruz and Sheriff Lestrade, the Neverland Fate Stalkers were called to expand their normal matchmaking duties to include public safety. They may be lovers, not fighters, but Neverland stayed quiet except for a few rustling shrubs.

A Michaelstone! Kensington Chronicle’s resident advice columnist and vlogger Michael Darling celebrated his 100th episode of Dear Darling this week. His unique blend of heartfelt advice and off-the-wall antics have made for quite a run. Here’s hoping he’ll have a hundred more great episodes – maybe guest starring his sister and new boss-in-law Wendy!

My Fair Soiree. As expected, Ms. Lakewood’s engagement party was quite the event! The guest list included Cecco, Ed Teynte, her roller derby crew, Marvel executives, Chris Pratt and Mermaid Lagoon. Neverlandians in attendance were Wendy Darling, Jas Hook, Sheriff Lestrade, Bri Valdivia, Nanny Ams, and Fish Girl Pond. The surprise of the night was when Special Guest Julie Andrews came out of retirement to sing to the couple.

Editor-in-Grief. If you have been keeping up with the paper through this difficult transition, you may be missing a certain voice. If the Kensington Chronicle is the heart of Neverland, then John Darling is the heart of the Kensington Chronicle. We here at the paper miss his passion and commitment, and look forward to his return! Now back to my absolutely filthy desk…

All My Single Landies! A certain gossip columnist promised to feature sexy singles in her column sometime. Well, carpe date ’em! If you’d like to be mentioned, DM me with a little bio about yourself and what you’re looking for in a significant other. Summer’s coming to an end, and as that crisp fall weather approaches, we all deserve someone special to cuddle up to.

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Posted in Neverspeak
Posted on September 1, 2015

100 Ways to Stay Alive on the Web!

Ahoy-hoy, Darlingites! This edition of John’s Editorials is brought to you by the irreversible Michael Darling, and the letter “O.”  As in, “OMG, I can’t believe I’ve been hosting ‘Dear Darling’ for 100 episodes!”  I know John usually writes these, but in honor of this milestone, he let me tag in!  And here I am, ready to talk about one of my favorite subjects: ME!

That’s right, it’s been 100 episodes since I took over “Dear Darling” from my sister, Wendy,  and our numbers are better than ever! (Not that it’s a competition.)  Wendy was the inventor of the format, after all.  And mostly, I’m just glad she and I are on speaking terms again.

Since Mr. Hook has ALL the money, I expect my salary will go up a million percent.  But don’t worry, I have no plans to retire.  I love all of you too much!  And, look, as long as we’re talking about it, I’m gonna get sappy for a second.  I couldn’t do this show without all of you viewers.  I literally couldn’t.  Without you, I’d have nobody to give advice to!  So I wanted to take a minute to do a bunch of shoutouts to friends of the show, people who help make “Dear Darling” the Kensington Chronicle’s most popular advice vlog.  In no particular order:

JH Media computer whiz Zoe Penderghast, who helped salvage my hard drive after it got wet during the last Fish Girl Pond concert.  Hannah Hope, one of my high school buds, who just recently became a teacher at Neverland High.  Say hi to Aurelia Lavoix for me, she’s the voice coach there!  Gotta give the Heisel twins credit for world’s best prank, even if it was at my expense!  You know what you did.  Officer Kenzi Martin, who’s been helping Sheriff Lestrade settle into his new position.

My favorite non-human guest, Chuckles the high-fiving cat, and her human, Shirley Positive.  I’ve never met Alexander Trell in person, I don’t think anyone has seen him since he was 12.  But he writes in on a regular basis, and John tells me his books on LGBT issues are absolute page turners.  Maddy Pfairlove and her amazing strawberry banana smoothies.  Cornish Curios curator Brigid Cornish, who keeps coming up in conversation.  Holy alliteration, Batman!

Melissa “Buttons” Wilson for hosting our staff Bad Movie Nights.  Neverwhere Inn, where Colleen Husted leaves the light on for all of our celebrity guests.  Rufio Bascom of Rufio Consignments, who provided my jacket for the anniversary episode.  Vehura Hoshino and Luath Events for organizing the Chronicle Christmas party this past year.  Kaz and Bronwen for being the best interns a guy could have.

And I can’t leave out Jo and Freddie Wentworth, who created “Dear Darling’s” littlest fan, baby Lillian.  And of course, Monstro, Columbine Hailtree, Lily Belle Abbott, Erin Wilbert, Valeria Smooth, Kensy, Adelaide Turner, Big Matthew C., Amanda Carter and Ann Jensen, but you kids are getting a special shoutout in the anniversary show, so I’ll just name drop you all here.  Oh, but I will say to Monstro… glad to hear you and Teresa Delacruz worked out your differences, buddy.

We’ve got a star-studded anniversary episode in store for you guys this week.  It’s all I can do not to post the lineup here, but that’d spoil the surprise!  Moving forward, you might see videos even more often!  I have my entire room to myself for a change, which means I can do videos at all hours.

Thank you guys so much for making “Dear Darling” possible.  You ain’t seen nothing yet!

Sent from my iPhone,
Michael Darling

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Posted in Editorials
Posted on August 27, 2015

Neverspeak Weekly 8/25/2015

New Paper. If you haven’t already heard, JHMedia has bought the Kensington Chronicle. It’s definitely a little weird around here, but we are optimistic that the new merger will allow the Chronicle to keep both its integrity and its place in the hearts of Neverlandians. It’s pretty well known around town that the paper has been going through some hard times. While it’s difficult to imagine the paper being run by anyone but the Darlings, the important thing is that it’s still here.

Reapply Your UnBlock. The members of the local band Fish Girl Pond were seen with some friends at the Jolly Roger taking a break from touring and songwriting for some much needed R&R. Nanny Ams, Mia Rivers, and Rowan O’Connor joined them over plates of nachos and bowls of ice cream. Word has it the band is working on some new material. Perhaps they will debut a new song at Sarah-Jane Lakewood’s engagement party this week?

Sign Language. Wendy Darling started her book tour here in Neverland last week. Locals lined up outside of Neverland Books to get their hands on some of the first copies of her new book “Ask Wendy!”. The local, soon to be national, celebrity was gracious and charming as she signed books for everyone who showed up and a few extras for those who couldn’t be there.

Beyond the Pale.  Even though it’s the end of summer and most of us are sun-kissed or just downright red, there have been a few new residents of the paler variety. Maybe they’re Scandinavian? But I never knew Scandinavians to have such a thirst for tomato juice. Well, thankfully, Teresa Delacruz seems to know how to keep those Scandinavians in line.  And don’t worry, she’s back from her vacation to Chicago with Neal.  Even Scandinavian wranglers need a little fun in the sun.

Bagha Tricks. Local entrepreneur Lily Bagha is having a bad week. Just as word leaked that she and Peter Pan were all but finished, her company was taken over in a hostile move by JHMedia. Bagha Industries had gone public earlier this week, flooding the market with its stocks. Apparently, this was a gamble. The company stood to make a huge profit while they risked someone buying up all the stocks and have the controlling share of the company. This is exactly what happened when Jas Hook swooped in and immediately booted Lily Bagha out.

Star-crossed. Sarah-Jane Lakewood and fiance Alfie will be celebrating their engagement this Friday. It should be a swanky party – the only catch is that it is taking place in New York.  The couple’s families and circle of Hollywood friends will be in attendance.  Word has it they are flying in Mermaid Lagoon for the occasion. The party will be a throwback to 1920s glamour with New Orleans cuisine and endless champagne.  So, if you can hop a plane (or convince Sarah-Jane to share her jet), you probably should!

Boy in Blue. Neverland couldn’t be happier with its new Deputy Sheriff G. Harrison Lestrade. One resident said, “I feel safer knowing that Deputy Sheriff Lestrade is on the case, keeping our town safe. And it helps that he’s cute.” Another pledged to make him her famous chili cheese tacos stating, “Well, that’s his nickname isn’t it?” Yes, yes it is. Thanks for your constant vigilance, Deputy Sheriff Tacos! Let us know how those chili cheese things turn out!

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Posted in Neverspeak
Posted on August 25, 2015

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  • 10:00 pmAsk Wendy Live!
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  • All DayOpenWindow Launch
  • 7:00 pmFree Dance Class: Ballet
  • 10:00 pmGarden of Light Tour w/ Michael Darling
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  • 6:00 pmBri’s Wedding Shower
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  • All DayNeverland Vernal Equinox Celebration
  • 6:25 amFirefly Festival
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