Neverspeak Weekly 3/14/17

Some Enchanted Vending… If you haven’t been to Neverland Books recently, it may be worth a visit. Owner Bri Valdivia recently installed a book dispenser that seems to be a bit magical. Word on the street is that it works like a regular vending machine (which by the way, I love the idea of a vending machine for books!), but the books it gives customers are oddly specific. Customer Gemma Willoe received a book about being happily single, while a certain gossip columnist who shall remain nameless got Harriet the Spy. No one knows exactly how this is happening, but there is some belief that fairy magic might be behind it. Given the recent influx of fairies into Neverland, that seems like a pretty good guess! After you’ve finished your spring cleaning, you might as well fill up your book shelf with titles that are tailored to you!

Spring Forward. You all may have cursed the daylight savings gods when you lost an hour of sleep on Sunday, but you know what that extra hour of sun means! It’s time for the annual Spring Fling. This coming Tuesday at 8PM rather than waiting for my column with baited breath, Neverlandians will be donning their finest frocks and dancing the night away. The ball will be the culmination of the Spring Festival in which Neverlandians celebrate the Vernal Equinox with two days of events including the Firefly Festival at the Skeleton Tree and High Tea Mixer held in the Garden of Light. The times of all events can be found on the community calendar. Looking forward to seeing the ensembles as colorful as all these spring flowers!

Bachelor No More. One of Neverland’s favorite couples is making it official! Bri Valdivia and Sheriff Harrison “Tacos” Lestrade are getting married. The couple was engaged during Thanksgiving last year and their April 29th wedding is quickly approaching. But, before the wedding can take place there, of course, has to be a bachelor party. I believe it is my responsibility to make this public service announcement. Stay off the streets on the night of April 14 because the men of Neverland will be having a wild night on the town. But, be warned, boys, the women of Neverland will not be shown up. Bri’s wedding shower will be held this Thursday at 6PM!

Local Initiatives. According to some folks, this column was a little hard on Lola Williams last week. To make up for it, I’d like to plug her new business, Sunny & Lola’s. Lola and her horse Sunday (Sunny for short) are in the business of teaching horseback riding (not boyfriend stealing!).  Teresa Delacruz, known mostly for her talent with the supernatural, has turned her attention to a more literary project. Follow her hashtag #NeverlandReads to hear her thoughts as she reads Jane Austen’s Emma for the first time. Or join her and use the hashtag yourself! I, for one, have read Emma at least a dozen times. I’m not sure why I relate to the character of a meddlesome busybody who gets into everyone’s business so much, but I do!

Too Many Secrets! Buddha once said, three things cannot long stay hidden: the sun, the moon and the truth. We must not have many buddhists in Neverland because it seems like everyone has a secret these days! And for a GOSSIP COLUMNIST this is very frustrating. So, now I’m going to frustrate you readers, and the chain of deception will continue to be forged link by link. Wendy Darling may be gathering forces for a secret project (apparently involving pizza), Amy Jolie may be revealing a well-kept secret at the upcoming Spring Fling, and Nanny Ams may have had a secret rendezvous with a charming chimney sweep in the Garden of Light last week.  Who knows?

Trending
Spring Fling shopping
Riverdale
#TinyTraynor
#NeverlandReads
the gender gap
Young and Hungry
#Sherlocklovesmolly
Trumpcare vs. Obamacare
PI Day

Best Tweet Ever
Shelby Loren Scott♡ @SimplyShelbs16 Mar 12
More
“If you obey all the rules, you’ll miss all the fun.” – #KatharineHepburn
#journal #Sherlock #EdSheeran #mine

Tagged with: , , , , , , ,
Posted in Neverspeak
Posted on March 14, 2017
One comment on “Neverspeak Weekly 3/14/17
  1. I’m assuming autocorrect was to blame, but “Vivaldi” should be “Valdivia.” Autocorrect hates my last name.

Leave a Reply

Get A Free Subscription

A weekly round up of all Neverland, Ohio news and posts. Sent every Sunday

want to add an event? click here

Sunday
Monday
Tuesday
Wednesday
Thursday
Friday
Saturday
25
26
27
28
29
30
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13
14
15
16
17
18
19
20
21
22
23
24
25
26
27
28
29
30
31
1
2
3
4
5

Weather in Neverland, Ohio

C

°F

Today: °F / °F Sat: °F / °F Sun: °F / °F
Top